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Hangover Helper®
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Hangover Helper®
One sure-fire way
"Man, being reasonable, must get drunk."
— Lord Byron
to ease a hangover's pain is to avoid booze altogether, but that's hardly an option. As Lord Byron once said, "Man, being reasonable, must get drunk." Until a cure is found, here are a few things you can do to prevent a hangover from ruining your day.


Drink Lots of Water
Alcohol is terribly dehydrating: drinking just two glasses of wine will send twice that amount of liquid out the other end. Drink lots of water before you go to bed. Drink even more when you get up. Especially savvy drinkers will even drink water while they're getting drunk, sneaking in gulps between belts of bourbon or bottles of beer.

Take an Aspirin Before Going to Bed
That familiar, pounding headache is a result of swollen blood vessels in your brain, and aspirin and other pain relievers, such as ibuprofen, can help the hurt. Aspirin can irritate some people's stomachs, so use with caution. Unless you want to get boiled in a hurry, don't take aspirin before the big party: a recent study revealed that men who took two aspirin before having a shot of whiskey absorbed from 40% to 100% more alcohol into their blood.

Find the Drink for You
All spirits contain so-called "congeners" — chemicals that give a drink its color and flavor, and depending on how you react to them, can also contribute greatly to the pain. Vodka and gin have the fewest congeners followed by blended scotch, brandy, rum, single malts, and whiskey. Anecdotal evidence suggests vodka does limit the next day's agony for many, but it surely is others' worst nightmare. This is why it's thought mixing all kinds of drinks together is a recipe for disaster: you're sure to drink something containing a chemical your body doesn't like.


top 5 bad things about a hangover
1. Nausea, vomiting
2. Splitting headache
3. Acidulous stools, burning sphincter
4. Mental anguish: Things I said last night
5. Mental anguish: My ridiculous dancing last night
Other Reader Suggestions:
> Mental anguish: The email I might have sent last night
> Mental anguish: The chick I had sex with last night
> Mental anguish: Who did I confess undying love to last night?
> Mental anguish: Who the hell did I wake up with this morning?
> Mental anguish: Why are my panties in my purse?
> Mental anguish: Whose doorstep did I pee on last night?
> Mental anguish: Where am I?
> Mental anguish: why is my underwear on backwards?
> Mental anguish: Riding the bumper cars at the fair only to wake up in a crowded parking lot.
> Mental anguish: 43 phone calls you can't remember, to friend who won't speak with you anymore.
> Mental anguish: have sexual intercourses with your boss' secretary at your company's xmas party
> Mental anguish: Whose underwear are these?
> Mental anguish: He/she must have gained 30 pounds since last night
> Mental anguish: Why did I get back together with my ex-girlfriend?
> Mental anguish: The numerous ATM receipts that appear from every pocket and the memory of being overcome with generosity every time you got near the bar.
> Mental anguish: How big really was she?
> Mental anguish: The dick I had sex with last night.
> Jaundice from liver shutting down
> Waking up in the slammer
> Three Letters: D.U.I.
> Three Letters: D.W.I.
> Waking up wearing the same clothes you had on the night before...only smelling worse.
> Looking out to see your car parked in the front yard.
> No longer wanting to drink
> Reeking of booze when going to work
> being sober
> Wondering where the body damage came from.
> waking up face down in the yard
> Puking/pissing/pooping in the bed
> Waking up and realizing you're dead
> Waking up and realizing you're alive
> The shit television you watch the whole day long
> waking up in the morning and wondering were your car is.
> beer farts
> Enlisting in the Navy
> waking up w/ your ass all sore
> Doing the "walk of shame" down the hotel corridor, with all of your underwear in your purse.
> Wondering which ex-lover I phoned at 3:00 a.m.
> "chunks" in my hair
> bruising of unknown provenance
> Having to work the day after
> low self esteem
> Waking up and realizing you've been written on - in permanent marker...
> finding the lid up on your hamper the next morning
> waking up in a jail cell after being arrested for pissing in an ice machine at the 7-11

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